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By Kellyanne
What’s up y’all? I really, really love the Southern accent.
Tournament.
Definition of Tournament
1: a series of games or contests that make up a single unit of competition (as on a professional golf tour), the championship playoffs of a league or conference, or an invitational event.
My best buddy makes silly videos, and he always says that when struggling to say anything, he’ll put the subject’s definition on the intro screen.
Now I’m stuck writing about tournaments.
Tournaments are such a fetish in wrestling, aren’t they? The number of promoters and “creatives” that come up to me with a massive “I GOT SOMETHING” look in their eye only to drop the “It’s a tournament for the cause” onto you. Fighting for the cause, that could be me. I could be inserted into a bracket.
“It’s all worth it to see my name in those brackets.”
“I’ll be covering every inch of my journey through these brackets.”
Please don’t. You are competing against a world at war. How long you can hold your plank for on a Wednesday morning ain’t going to compete with half of France outside Macron’s “work space” demanding his job on a platter.
Matter of fact: You’d be better off studying the volatility and the raw emotion being displayed out there in the real world, then integrating that into your performance. Your aggression would be … Mamma mia! I should stop giving away all my pointers. No one reads this anyway. I just keep hitting refresh on the browser most of the time until Special K lets me know the page has a hundred hits. Why make wrestling about anything else but you, right? What would be the point of that?
“I had my fair share of ups and downs. You can’t tell me what to feel.”
You can’t win an argument against that. I should stop right now. It doesn’t matter how small and isolated your world can get, it’s in our nature to make it hell. The problem is there’s thousands of people paying to see you perform. You trying to artistically (you’re the artist, not me) portray your battle with the hair straightener, or unleash a barrage of forearms as you tap into that indirect social media attack you think might have been about you because someone tagged you in it, is going to be hard work. Hard work for you, hard work for everyone.
I am writing all this because there is a tournament going on in ROH and I am not a part of it.
I am writing this because there will be an eventual winner of the tournament.
I am writing this because no matter how much you think you deserve to win this tournament, you are going to have to answer for it at some point. You will have to justify it. By “it” I don’t just mean the title. I mean the whole existence of the division, the meaning behind it and its validation.
Don’t just say stuff because you can. Don’t just dive off the top because you can. Justify it.
Kellyanne is a pro wrestler from Australia under contract with Ring of Honor. The Other Side w/Kellyanne appears every other Wednesday.
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