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By Caprice Coleman
I’m going to share a transparent moment I had with my daughter today.
I expressed my frustration with her wanting to do so many things at once. That way I saw it, she would fail to complete one thing before starting another.
She in turn showed me a lot of things that she did complete. Her vast interests include arts and crafts, dancing and singing.
My wife then said that “an artist needs more than just a paintbrush to express themselves.” I thought about it and realized that I was expecting my 11-year-old daughter to figure out who she wants to be in life.
Once revealed, it became clear to me: She’s so young and so talented, and she has enough time to try whatever she wants.
My job isn’t to figure out who she’s going to be, it’s to encourage her and give her the tools to become who she’ll be. I thought about that and applied it to our roles in life.
In any biography you read or watch, there are pretty much three groups of people in the main character’s life who helped make the person who they are. There are people who supported them, those who didn’t, and those who caused them problems.
I frequently think about what role I play in others’ lives. The last thing I want to be is the person who didn’t support somebody at a time when they needed me the most.
I often talk to parents who have difficulties with their children and the choices they’re making. The only advice I can give them is to try their best to be the person in their children’s biography who never gave up on them. It’s not always an easy task, but the effort alone is evident and unforgettable.
It’s hard for me to understand the arts and crafts part of my daughter. She definitely didn’t get that from me (LOL). It’s easier for me to understand my son’s interests because we’re into similar stuff. However, I can’t pick and choose what I’m going to support from either of my children.
I said all of that to say I realize I’m not perfect. Just because I don’t understand my role in someone’s life doesn’t mean I can’t support them as they figure it out. We all play roles in people’s lives.
When we look back, we’ll remember who was there for us, who wasn’t, and who caused us pain. It’s also possible to cause pain to someone because you’re supporting them “your way.”
Sometimes we need to take a step back and ask ourselves what role we’re playing in others’ lives. Trust me, they know. It’s not too late to change roles, because as long as they’re alive, the biography is still a work in progress.
Just something to think about. I call it A dose of Colemanism.
Caprice Coleman is ROH’s color analyst and has been wrestling for more than 20 years. He also is an ordained minister and motivational speaker. “A Dose of Colemanism” appears every Thursday.
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